Cigarettes are the Devil.
There is no better morning combination then a cup of coffee and nicotine....
I made it 12 hours, then 24, then 36, but just as I was inching to 48 I failed.
Around 10pm last night, I decided to drive to Walgreens. I made it into the store and bee-lined it for the candy aisle. The damn clerks kept walking past me like I was trying to steal candy. Come the F on! I am a regular there.
Anyways, I grab some of the new Sea salt Dark Chocolate, a monster pack of Tic Tacs and some wintergreen gum. I head to the checkout counter where I let one of my candy aisle stalkers ring me up, give me the total and then I say, very softly and practically under my breath, "and one pack of Marlboro Ultra Lights". The less dorkier clerk says, "No."
Let me remind you that at this point I have not smoked in nearly 48 hours, so this is where I envision myself jumping over the counter and delivering a roundhouse kick to the little punk's head. I pay. Thinking to myself that I need no reminders of what I just purchased I say, "You can trash the receipt". I leave.
I drive home to eat one piece of chocolate while staring at the plastic Walgreen's bag; the Marlboro logo peeks out throught the plastic .
I quickly tear open the bag, then the pack of cigarettes- like a crack addict who had just met with her dealer.
I pull one out, I light it and inhale. Suddenly, I feel all this weight lift off my shoulders. With each drag, I feel calmer. I try imagining it tastes like shit, but who am I kidding?
Then I feel guilt and throw the entire pack away only to dig them out of the trash this morning.
Can't someone just lock me in a room, strap me to a bed, and treat me like I am a heroin addict?! PLEASE!
I made it 12 hours, then 24, then 36, but just as I was inching to 48 I failed.
Around 10pm last night, I decided to drive to Walgreens. I made it into the store and bee-lined it for the candy aisle. The damn clerks kept walking past me like I was trying to steal candy. Come the F on! I am a regular there.
Anyways, I grab some of the new Sea salt Dark Chocolate, a monster pack of Tic Tacs and some wintergreen gum. I head to the checkout counter where I let one of my candy aisle stalkers ring me up, give me the total and then I say, very softly and practically under my breath, "and one pack of Marlboro Ultra Lights". The less dorkier clerk says, "No."
Let me remind you that at this point I have not smoked in nearly 48 hours, so this is where I envision myself jumping over the counter and delivering a roundhouse kick to the little punk's head. I pay. Thinking to myself that I need no reminders of what I just purchased I say, "You can trash the receipt". I leave.
I drive home to eat one piece of chocolate while staring at the plastic Walgreen's bag; the Marlboro logo peeks out throught the plastic .
I quickly tear open the bag, then the pack of cigarettes- like a crack addict who had just met with her dealer.
I pull one out, I light it and inhale. Suddenly, I feel all this weight lift off my shoulders. With each drag, I feel calmer. I try imagining it tastes like shit, but who am I kidding?
Then I feel guilt and throw the entire pack away only to dig them out of the trash this morning.
Can't someone just lock me in a room, strap me to a bed, and treat me like I am a heroin addict?! PLEASE!
Posted by Lextra Dirty at 10/14/2009 12:49 PM 
Categories: vices
Tags: walgreens hours devil chocolate roundhouse kick cigarettes nicotine
Categories: vices
Tags: walgreens hours devil chocolate roundhouse kick cigarettes nicotine
Cigarettes really are the devil; but, I enjoy inviting them out on a friday night :0/ At least you got a cute story from them.
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Just about everyone I know that smokes is the same way, they all hate that tehy do it but wont stop because of the stress. It takes alot to quit smoking but from the friends I have whom have quit it is definately worth it. Especially to the pocket book which was once empty with nothing but ashes from the cigarettes but is now filled with the extra money.
Hope fully one day you can kick the habit!
Cheers!
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Thanks Michael! I need all the support I can get! This is big quit #2, it's gonna be a tough ride.
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I hear you, loud and clear (and am also wondering if we go to the same Walgreens...lol!) I quit smoking 6 months ago and it was easier than I thought (considering I had smoked since I was 11 years old...yay me...cough...) What I did was when I wanted a ciggie I would smoke half, cut the tip off to save the rest for later and walked away. Did this for 3 months....(I never felt like I was denying myself a ciggie either) and them made my last pack of smokes last me a week and then I quit, with one ciggie in reserve...ok, I did smoke that one within a couple of days...but then I was done. It was easier this way because I weaned myself off nicotine and my body never saw it coming. PHEW!! I feel better now though and so glad I did it. I wish you oodles and oodles of luck, strength and support!
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Dawn, I keep trying the slow method. I think it works for some and not others -I am an other. It's funny though, the times I should be smoking a whole bunch (while drinking) I can go hours without one. I guess it's all in my head.
Thank you for the luck and well wishes! I need every bit of it :O)
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I too have friends with the same struggle. Some have quit successfully, others gave up trying...for now...
I think you'll be able to do it in time especially since it seems to be a goal of yours. Shoot, this site probably was a big and challenging goal to accomplish and you got it done! And it's super cool and sexy! So, I know you'll get it done.
By the way, the thought of you giving the cashier a Chuck Norris to the head had me rolling!
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Dave,
It really is a struggle and I think for now, it is on the back burner. At least until after some work drama calms down.
Glad I made you laugh! And thanks so much for checking out the site!
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Chanix, it really f-ing works. It works like antibuse for alcoholics, blocks the brain from wanting a cig. It worked for three months for me, then after Chloe died, I went back to smoking bc I didn't have any more xanax left
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Loosa,
Isn't nicotine a drug? I think I would rather stay away from what got me into this addiction to begin with. Cold turkey is the way I will go...even if I have to be gagged and strapped to a bed ;o)
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